When Poseidon has his day ...

poipu
Originally uploaded by playzwifstonz

'Cause the fleet of hope is so pretty
when she's shining in the port
and the harbor clings to the jetty
for protection and support
Out in the choppy waters the sharks
swim and play
you're all washed up when Poseidon
has his day ...
~  Indigo Girls

Whether it is "riding waves"  in kabbalistic terms or an AA slogan like  "easy does it", one of the difficulties of being on the earth plane and having the human experience is the fact that we will be faced with life events that challenge us to our core.  Some will toss us about and knock us around while other things will hit us with gale force winds and pummel us into the ground.   Being sober, we learn we can survive even the tsunami of our life without taking a drink.

In my women's meeting last night, there was intensely deep, painfully raw sharing. The losses experienced in this room seem unfathomable in one sitting. A woman who loses the love of her life to cancer and does not take a drink yet longs to feel the touch of her deceased husband's finger across her cheek.  Another woman who lost her father almost a year ago shares once more that she keeps hitting new bottoms as she struggles with how to mourn him and not seek comfort in the bottle. A woman who lost her daughter to a tragic accident is able to muster the strength to be at meetings everyday and not pick up a drink, yet can share about the hole burning in her soul and the depth of this loss as she is reminded that her daughter would be a senior in high school now had she survived.  Yet another woman huddled in the corner of the room, whose hand was held by another member, tearfully shares how she witnessed her dog, her sole companion, be hit and killed by a car just yesterday and she found the strength to come to a meeting because she didn't want to turn to alcohol.

In my kabbalistic program, there are similar acts of courage -- 3 of our members who've faced breast cancer, others who've had losses of children to terminal illness or suicide, and countless more who have directly experienced the terror of abuse or neglect in all of its forms, both overt and covert.  The common thread that weaves us together is our longing for wholeness and healing and to be closer to G-d.

I am coming to understand more and more that the courage each of us has to meet these life circumstances is magnified because of our membership in the community and the fellowship that is there. When we don't have enough of ourselves to carry on alone, we have the power of the group to hold us until we can walk on our own.

The healing presence that was in the AA women's meeting last night was felt like an enormous security blanket, wrapping us all in its love and its non-judgment and its strength. It is the "magic" that happens when we gather and allow for everything to have a place and to trust that just the "uttering" of your share in the room will be healing in and of itself as soon as your words hit the air. And you can see and feel the heaviness being lifted and dissipated. You watch each woman as her burden is a bit lighter when she exits the room. There is laughter and playfulness and one-to-one conversations that continue on under the moonlit sky outside the room long after the meeting is over and another layer of healing is occurring.

This is why we encourage one another to keep coming back.

It really does work, if you work it.