As Good as it Gets ...

Yummy!!
Originally uploaded by booboo1604
Holiday weekends when I was an alcoholic represented one thing: MORE time to get drunk. I lived for Memorial, July 4th, and Labor Day weekends in particular. I would plan days, perhaps weeks ahead, for the amount of beer and liquor and other paraphanalia I needed to stock up on. I have little to no memories of most of these holidays -- who with, where they were spent. Like the TV screen when programming has ended for the night and there's just the fuzzy picture with no sound.

A gift of recovery is appreciating the fullness and clarity of a weekend such as this one. And all the little things that can be enjoyed without being completely wasted, in a blackout, or painfully hungover. How I spent my day today is a perfect example.

I took the dog for a long walk this morning and did one of my healing practices in the field surrounded by woods about a half mile from my home. This practice, in and of itself, brought me vividly into relationship with the beauty that has always been here, yet which was totally absent from my view of life as an alcoholic. The scent of honeysuckle, the varying melodies of the birds, the feel of grass between my toes, the graceful flight patterns of butterflies. I then spent an hour on the phone with a classmate from my healing program to talk about this very practice. The afternoon found me with good friends, soaking up the glorious sunshine while grilling amazing food and savoring even more flavorful, nourishing conversations. This was my last Sunday for the coffee commitment at my AA meeting and it was lovely to be in a room filled with friends who didn't want to take a drink on a Holiday weekend. The "nightcap" was having ice cream cones with my sponsee and a friend from the fellowship to celebrate her 4 months of sobriety today. We sat under the clear, star-filled sky, appreciating another day sober together.

One day at  time.  This is as good as it gets ...