Any length for sobriety ...

Rainier Descent
Originally uploaded by photo61guy

As I arose this morning, the snow had already been falling steady, with about 2 inches on the ground. A fleeting thought entered my mind about just staying in bed and not going to my morning meeting. And then, this flash: on days like this, even in blizzard conditions, I always found a way to get a drink. And with that, I got up, said my prayers, and prepared for my snowy trek to the meeting.

The roads were slick and the driving was challenging to say the least. And what I continued to tell myself aloud in the car is that if I just take my time, be cautious, everything will be alright. And getting to a meeting was the most important thing I could do to honor myself today. What was normally a 10 minute ride took a half hour and I made it well on time.

Arriving through the doors of the meeting, there was just one person there. And she informed me that the chairperson was not able to make it because of the weather and she asked if I would like to chair the meeting. I accepted graciously and knew right then that my grappling this morning was worth getting there.

At the start of the meeting, there were 5 of us. This is normally a meeting which can exceed 50 or more people. And as the beginning segments of readings were underway, one by one the members trickled in, covered in wet snow yet with smiles on their faces. I lit up in my seat just watching each person enter and I knew what I would talk about for the topic of discussion.

I shared with the group what it was like to want to invest in my sobriety today and that I would go to any length, including driving in snowy terrain, to do so and how good that felt. I expressed gratitude that each person in the room who also made that choice was helping me to be sober today. And with that, I opened the floor for sharing. It was intimate and warm and nearly every person got to share, which was a treat given the size of the typical Sat morning meeting audience. People spoke of the commraderie in the room and how great it was to be reminded that we each had the willingness to go to any length for sobriety.

After the meeting, several of us stayed and talked and laughed and commiserated about the conditions and what the day would look like for each of us. I left there in such a state of deep appreciation. And funny thing is that I didn't even mind the snow ! In fact, I parked the car on the main drag of the little town where the meeting was held and I walked into stores and then picked up items at the Farmers Market so I could make a nice dinner for myself, knowing I'll be snowed in.

The trek home was even longer and I listened to Christmas music and simply took my time. Entering my home was such a delight, as it was a welcoming warm and cozy reprieve from the bitterness outside.

And today, there is not the kind of anxiety I experienced both in my alcoholism and even after I stopped drinking about being stuck inside for the day. I have a book I've never read that awaits me. I lit candles. I will turn on the Christmas tree in a little while. I'll make some phone calls to friends I've not spoken to in some time. And then I'll make a lovely dinner and after that, who knows and who cares.

It is an exceptional day to be sober.